Tuesday, December 26, 2006

the beginning of the end, the death of the "great experiment in self-government"

Habeas Corpus has been suspended, welcome back to the Inquisition, confess and receive your salvation:
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=-aeCc_UYLM8
but the government protects your rights, right? I bet this guy thought they would too:
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=rDXlCWzbthU
however, don't worry, they're not going to kill you, a short stint in Room 101 will cure what ails you:
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=Aer9Gu8H7Cc
I might have to check that out, conspiracy theories are fun but I always like to check the facts before I'll believe it.  I should probably hurry up and check it out before Bush and Co. brand me as a seditionist and I disappe























and its official, The Administration's decisions have resulted in more American deaths than al Qaeda's:
http://news.yahoo.com/s/ap/20061226/ap_on_re_mi_ea/iraq

UPDATE: the other day I put this link in the email about a Times article being censored by the White House, here's what they censored:
http://www.nytimes.com/2006/12/22/opinion/22precede.html
I truly believe that the internet may become the last refuge of the truth and even it is under attack by both the government and the companies that run it.  history will tell if we can defend our rights and the truth, but then again if the forces of power and control win, we may never know these things ever existed
here's some more proof about our 1984 direction:
http://www.theregister.co.uk/2001/04/19/trial_by_cctv_claims_innocent/
http://www.bloomberg.com/apps/news?pid=20601109&sid=avL4PSqZrcj4&refer=home

did you know that "It's a Wonderful Life" is communist propaganda?  that's what the government says and don't they always know best?
http://www.wisebread.com/fbi-considered-its-a-wonderful-life-communist-propaganda

why we may not have to worry about Iran:
http://www.cnn.com/2006/WORLD/meast/12/25/iran.oil.ap/index.html?eref=rss_topstories

Biden wants honesty from Bush, perhaps he needs to ask Moses how to get water from a rock:
http://www.msnbc.msn.com/id/11442717/
also he'll fight him on sending more troops into Iraq:
http://www.iht.com/articles/ap/2006/12/26/america/NA_GEN_US_Senate_Foreign_Relations.php

and now for something hilarious from the insurgents, if we leave Iraq within a month and leave our weapons behind, they will allow us to leave peacefully:
http://www.cnn.com/2006/WORLD/meast/12/22/iraq.main/index.html?eref=rss_topstories

25 quotes to ponder for a new year:
http://www.dailykos.com/storyonly/2006/12/24/73147/897
I like 11 and 1 but 4 is what I live by and is the inspiration for what I do
and here are a few more:
*He that would make his own liberty secure, must guard even his enemy from opposition; for if he violates this duty he establishes a precedent that will reach himself.
*It is the direction and not the magnitude which is to be taken into consideration.
*That government is best which governs least.
Thomas Paine


the lighter side of news for darker times

get ready for the future, it is indeed lighter:
http://www.newscientisttech.com/article.ns?id=dn10851&feedId=online-news_rss20

an electric sport-utility truck that does 95mph, 0-60 in less than 10 sec, AND completely charges in 10 MINUTES:
http://phoenixmotorcars.com/models/fleet.html
currently it has a 130 mile range with a 250 mile version in the works, HALLELUJAH!!
and here is another reason to be excited:
http://www.treehugger.com/files/2006/12/plugin_hybrids_2.php
can termites save us from the energy crisis?
http://www.physorg.com/news3700.html

for all of you that know me personally all I have to say is neener neener neener, my mess makes me smarter:
http://www.nytimes.com/2006/12/21/garden/21mess.html?_r=1&em&ex=1167109200&en=9f7fc45bca81bd36&ei=5087%0A&oref=slogin
and so do my videogames:
http://ca.news.yahoo.com/s/capress/061223/technology/technology_brains_video_games_1

ELEVATORS IN SPAAAAAACE:
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=F2UZDHHDhog

a pen that uses no ink and will never be used up in your lifetime:
http://www.grand-illusions.com/acatalog/info_48.html

1up.com doles out the Xmas gifts for the gaming industry:
http://www.1up.com/do/feature?cId=3156060

two heads may be better than one, but I don't know what to make of this:
http://www.theliberalblogger.com/forum/f2/woman-has-ability-double-her-pleasure-1643/#4912

privacy is dead and we killed it:
http://www.hexus.net/content/item.php?item=7499

actions have consequences, here's the reason why you shouldn't commit rape:
http://forum.autocareforum.com/forum.src?Action=Posts&Subject=11234&Topic=34
the faint of heart need not click

proof that Cheech and Chong could time-travel:
http://english.people.com.cn/200612/23/eng20061223_335258.html

welcome to the WiiHome, where Wii takes over your whole life:
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=beZC2gpFN7I
http://www.techeblog.com/index.php/tech-gadget/video-wii-media-center-x

and to complement the quotes in the serious email here's some dumb ones from people in 2006:
http://www.wired.com/news/technology/0,72320-0.html?tw=wn_index_3

The Daily Schadenfreude, served well chilled:
http://wcco.com/topstories/local_story_360132351.html

Friday, December 22, 2006

Wiitastic

just got the internet browser for the Wii and thought I'd post a "quick" hello. they are really going to have to put out a keyboard for this damn thing, right now you have to use the onscreen keyboard with the wiimote, which is madding. but I luvs it :)

Tuesday, December 19, 2006

whats more fun than a mindbogglingly huge debt? the news you might not be able to pay it back!


out of the gate today we'll examine the fact that we're boned...completely, utterly boned and here's why:
http://financialsense.com/fsu/editorials/martenson/2006/1217.html
"Despite improvement in both the fiscal year 2006 reported net operating cost and the cash-based budget deficit, the U.S. government's total reported liabilities, net social insurance commitments, and other fiscal exposures continue to grow and now total approximately $50 trillion, representing approximately four times the Nation's total output (GDP) in fiscal year 2006, up from about $20 trillion, or two times GDP in fiscal year 2000."
wow, I wonder, what could have possibly happened between 2000 and 2006? <strokes chin and muses> "gee, that's a tough one mister, can I still have $50 so I can buy an apple core for my family?  and if you have a stack of ones on you we could really use that for our fire."  and if that isn't bad enough, oil is now starting the trend to be traded on the euro instead of the dollar.
I can't begin to tell you how bad this can become, but here's a primer.
simple solution? kill the old people and nuke the banks carrying our debt.  PROBLEM SOLVED! :D

this I found interesting and important enough to put close to the top:
http://craigsnumber.com/
A FREE, ANONYMOUS internet phone number that forwards to your phone of choice, VIVA LA INFORMATION REVOLUTION!!

HOLY...FREAKING...CRAP  this is a new low for The Administration, if you've been mentally fucked up by governmental torture (which we don't do, but just saying if it did happen) then your testimony about said alleged torture is unacceptable in court because you're mentally incompetent:
http://www.salon.com/news/feature/2006/12/18/tennessee_terrorist/index.html
ladies and gentlemen, this is endgame, I can give you no greater example of 1984 draconian ideology than that

oh First Amendment, what a pesky little bugger you are, you're either too strong or not strong enough:
http://www.usatoday.com/news/education/2006-09-17-amendments_x.htm
http://www.nytimes.com/2006/12/18/nyregion/18kearny.html?ex=1324098000&en=87af8b74af1e13cc&ei=5090&partner=rssuserland&emc=rss

Pelosi plans to peek at pesky political purses:
http://www.humanevents.com/article.php?id=18510
proof the Dems aren't all they're cracked up to be, in case you forgot they're politicians too

North Korean demands for disarming their nukes:
http://news.moneycentral.msn.com/provider/providerarticle.aspx?feed=FT&Date=20061219&ID=6282798
my favorite? number 57: we demand Teresa Heinz Kerry because she's so saucy

the best way to deal with criticism? don't let those bastards say it in the first place:
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=VfGINEWO_2I

the top 10 stories of 2006 I would have gotten to eventually:
http://web0.foreignpolicy.com/story/3652_0.html
wait, does this count? yes? awesome, I covered everything this year!

remember kids, you don't want to be an "enemy combatant" in custody of the US:
http://www.lewrockwell.com/orig7/greenwald3.html

foreign policy, founding father style:
http://www.lewrockwell.com/paul/paul356.html

cigarettes cause global warming...wait, no, I read that wrong.  what do global warming and cigarettes have in common?  according to people that profit from them, neither will kill you:
http://www.cbc.ca/fifth/video_player.html?denial

bye bye science, we hardly knew ye:
http://yro.slashdot.org/yro/06/12/16/1532244.shtml
but the scientists will fight the power:
http://news.bbc.co.uk/2/hi/science/nature/6178213.stm

here we have possibly the best definition of irony I've seen lately:
http://www.npr.org/templates/story/story.php?storyId=6626823

how do you settle differences in the 21st century? with Wii of course!
http://www.thelastboss.com/post.phtml?pk=1660

when jumping into a shark tank with steaks strapped to you isn't enough:
http://www.collegehumor.com/video:1722000

internet? cable TV? phone service?  AT&T says "yes-no/no-yes" and asks if the FCC can define "is"
http://arstechnica.com/articles/culture/u-verse.ars

now you see me, but soon you won't:
http://www.newscientisttech.com/article/dn10816.html

BALLOON!
http://www.eaa.org/communications/eaanews/061214_blimp.html

makes you think twice about that McDonald's ranch burger doesn't it?
http://www.thesmokinggun.com/archive/1218062castro1.html
and speaking of white goo, did you know that mayonnaise demostrates quantum mechanics?
http://antwrp.gsfc.nasa.gov/apod/ap061217.html

and the Daily Schadenfreude:
http://www.collegehumor.com/video:1717965

Wednesday, December 13, 2006

'tis the season to be jolly for news

well GAWDDARNIT! its like a bad dream that keeps getting worse:
http://www.rawstory.com/news/2006/Senator_Tim_Johnson_reportedly_suffers_stroke_1213.html

hydrogen economy set to crash and burn, Herb Morrison unavailable for comment:
http://www.physorg.com/news85074285.html
I honestly want to know who's bright idea it was to propose an entire infrastructure centered around an element that doesn't occur naturally on Earth. I've got a better idea, if we start producing pixie dust we could just fly around instead of all this driving nonsense. Actually I guess that suggestion starts to break down around the Happy Thought phase of implementation because we have a shortage of that resource these days...

OH NOES!!1 NEW LAWZ ENDANGER SUVz IN KALI!!1one
http://sfgate.com/cgi-bin/article.cgi?f=/c/a/2006/11/28/GREENHOUSE.TMP
OH TEH HUMAN1TYZ!!1
http://www.msnbc.msn.com/id/15935111/
I'm going to take this one a bit further and break it down.
"If we lost (in court)," said Dave Barthmuss, General Motors' spokesman for environmental and energy affairs, "certain vehicles could not be offered for sale -- vehicles that consume more fuel than others. There would be fewer SUVs and we might not be able to offer them for sale in California. It could spell the end of the big SUV in California."
BOOHOO, somebody call a Prius whaaambulence for these bastards. I've said it before, and I'll say it again, a 90lbs housewife does not need a Sherman tank to drop the kids off at soccer practice. In an era of record-high energy prices were said energy comes from the most volatile and dangerous areas of the world we have
automakers crying about the end of their grotesque, wasteful creations. It's like Nero bitching that his violin is out of tune. This next quote illustrates the point nicely:
G.M.'s Barthmuss said the efforts by California and the 11 other states to be able to limit greenhouse gas emissions "is really a state attempt to try to regulate fuel economy, because the way you reduce greenhouse gases is to reduce the amount of fuel you burn." Fuel economy regulation, Barthmuss said, is the responsibility of the federal government and should be handled only by the federal government.
OK, so here we have an admission that a) SUVs are greenhouse gas spewing monstrosities and b) they have sucky fuel economy. Then he cleverly defers to "the government" as the arbiter of standards as if to imply that all California is seeking is more power and a chance to further interfere in the lives of the average American. "Damn west coast liberals!" mutters Barthmuss as he cuts the check to Universal Studios for the nice product placement in Miami Vice 3: Operation Smoke-a-Cuban. But sadly his statement fails to hold water because "the government" is going to do nothing about fuel standards for two reasons; 1) the federal government's impotence when it comes to enacting forward thinking but politically risky strategies and 2) this government is in the pocket of the American automakers and their bedfellows Big Oil. So leave it to California to once again blaze a path into the future, but watch out because they may force you to have cleaner air and lower your energy consumption.

here's what Bush will do about Iraq, or might do, or in some theories of multiverse physics has already done:
http://www.themoderatevoice.com/posts/chain_1164386997.shtml
Bush compares Iraq to Vietnam, which I hardly think he's qualified to do since he only saw Vietnam for the first time a couple of weeks ago:
http://www.cbsnews.com/stories/2006/11/22/opinion/main2205512.shtml
ah ok, its those crazy al Qaeda boys at it again. whew, I was worried this was a civil war:
http://www.iht.com/articles/2006/11/28/europe/web.1128prexy.php

wiretaps, good, bad, whats the difference? it won't stop for another two years anyway:
http://www.iht.com/articles/2006/11/24/news/NSA.php
late to the party as usual, the government will investigate the spying program, way to be on the ball guys:
http://www.forbes.com/business/manufacturing/feeds/ap/2006/11/27/ap3207168.html

oil prices hurt Indian economy, we're next:
http://www.business-standard.com/common/storypage.php?leftnm=lmnu2&subLeft=1&autono=266042&tab=r

"let's get out of here!" says NATO
http://news.independent.co.uk/world/asia/article2018685.ece

the image of our generation, ladies and gentlemen, I present Generic Fat Kid:
http://www.local6.com/health/10524511/detail.html?rss=orlpn&psp=news#
seriously, this kid's picture gets used for every fat story, if I were him I'd sue for either compensation or emotional distress...or both, it is America after all. then he can use the money for liposuction, stomach stapling, and getting a sponsorship from Subway

so, he's from Alabama, he currently has my last name, and he's auctioning renaming himself, NO RELATION:
http://www.detnews.com/apps/pbcs.dll/article?AID=/20061213/NATION/612130437/1020/NATION
ok ok ok, its me, I needed the money

Harry Potter teaches kids about the Devil and it needs to be pulled from shelves:
http://www.iht.com/articles/ap/2006/12/12/america/NA_GEN_US_Harry_Potter_Protest.php
while you're at it, get rid of those pesky reference books like the encyclopedia and useless things like the internet because kids might find pagan stuff there too. just keep the kids locked inside watching Veggie Tales on repeat, that'll save their precious little souls

incoming!
http://www.engadget.com/2006/11/24/more-wiimote-related-damage-just-in-time-for-the-holidays/
Wiiiiiiiii-oooowww!

solar madness:
http://www.msnbc.msn.com/id/15931847/

this guy is great, he's freakin hillarious:
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=aibKW_1HV-c
and everything you need to know about "that time of the month":
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=mCwKbUVyHLY

you can't leave me, I'm pregnant, or why the Mitten State sucks:
http://www.foxnews.com/story/0,2933,236144,00.html
and now, some good news, yet another male birth control option is around the corner, the tyranny of the uterus is ended! long live the penis!
http://www.msnbc.msn.com/id/15937201/

finally the link du jour, the Daily Schadenfreude:
http://www.11alive.com/news/news_article.aspx?storyid=89004
and a penis joke for the road:
http://www.thesun.co.uk/article/0,,2-2006570530,00.html

Saturday, November 25, 2006

OMG LOLZ!!1 U ROXXORZ TEH INTERWEB NEWZ!!1one


so much for "with us or the terrorists", Iran gets a great deal on air defense missile systems from Russia:
http://edition.cnn.com/2006/WORLD/meast/11/24/russia.iran.reut/index.html

see? the democrats won and now more babies will die, ergo, the terrorists won:
http://www.sltrib.com/news/ci_4714291

another reason to consider the land of the north for your next home:
http://www.msnbc.msn.com/id/15871644/
now that's what I'm talkin aboot
and coming in at number 9 on the democracy scale, not the US:
http://www.aftenposten.no/english/local/article1543571.ece
unfortunately I think they send dodgers back these days:
http://www.foxnews.com/story/0,2933,231758,00.html

ok, when I watch this commercial, I envision a guy fleeing the oncoming horde before succumbing to the onslaught:
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=j1v5-MKWxxU
I'll take a quick moment to comment on another interesting internet trend.  apparently now you can post a video response to videos you view on youtube.  it began with this simple, slightly amusing video of a pug spinning around imitating a blender:
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=l9l19D2sIHI
cute, right? but this is just the start of a weird journey into the minds of people on the internet.  now we have the chance to see what the twisted minds of the people who viewed this clip came up with.  first we have the subtle, witty response from muttley, who assures us its really him:
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=SB6VjbyNjaQ
I don't know why an Iraqi insurgent was watching a pug dance, but I dig his humor
next we have...well I don't know what this is, you just have to watch for yourself:
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=ZmJ9mxPHG8c
this is what the internet is going to do to us all, we're all going to go insane.  I'm just glad I got a head start :)

suck it verizon/t-mobile/cingular:
http://www.theregister.com/2006/11/23/congress_dmca_cellphones_censorware/

not getting lucky often enough? blame the pilgrims:
http://www.msnbc.msn.com/id/15754563/
"yeah we really only have one rule around here in Plymouth, if its fun, its probably a sin"
and here's some advice to getting the other luck:
http://news.bbc.co.uk/1/hi/magazine/3335275.stm

your whole wheat bread just got alot healthier:
http://sfgate.com/cgi-bin/article.cgi?f=/c/a/2006/11/24/BAG4JMJ6EK1.DTL

come, let us look into the future...all the way to the year 2000:
http://www.newscientist.com/channel/opinion/science-forecasts/dn10580
where's my flying car?!?

if you loved the idiot breaking the sword on the shopping network, get ready for his encore with a Dell computer:
http://www.techeblog.com/index.php/tech-gadget/video-dont-shop-at-home
ONE HUNDRED TWENTY EIGHT!!

Mmmmmmm, cotton tshirts....
http://houston.bizjournals.com/houston/stories/2006/11/20/daily19.html

the evolution up to the Revolution:
http://www.techeblog.com/index.php/tech-gadget/video-the-evolution-of-video-games

your wi-fi laptop is giving you cancer...head cancer:
http://www.timesonline.co.uk/article/0,,591-2461748,00.html

MUST...HAVE...
http://www.techeblog.com/index.php/tech-gadget/samsung-sph-p9000-live-shots

free speech in high school? obviously this kid is living in Dreamland:
http://www.ntnews.news.com.au/common/story_page/0,7034,20818124%5E13569,00.html

the Russians were obviously overcompensating for something here:
http://www.techeblog.com/index.php/tech-gadget/video-a-look-back-worlds-most-powerful-nuclear-weapon

The Daily Schadenfreude:
http://cbs3.com/topstories/local_story_328141923.html

Thursday, November 9, 2006

in Soviet Russia, news reads you!


Good Morning Mr. President, would you like some OJ with your humble pie?
http://www.sfgate.com/cgi-bin/article.cgi?f=/c/a/2006/11/09/MNG1LM8VRV1.DTL
and for clarification, and an illustration of modern American politics, here's Bush's statements pre-election:
http://www.washingtonpost.com/wp-dyn/content/article/2006/10/30/AR2006103000530.html
way to cave in, sir.  I haven't seen a cave in like that since those coal mining accidents.
and its Webb with the breakaway for the win:
http://www.npr.org/templates/story/story.php?storyId=6463396
the Chinese weigh in with their thoughts:
http://watchingamerica.com/peoplesdaily000044.shtml
and the rest of the world gives its two cents, thus depriving starving children of their daily meal:
http://www.guardian.co.uk/worldlatest/story/0,,-6200318,00.html

this in from Iraq, the health minister says that over 150,000 Iraqis have died since the war's start, about three times more than the Administration has claimed:
http://news.bostonherald.com/international/view.bg?articleid=166517
its still shy of that 655,000 that The Lancet claimed but way more than the "official" count, as they often say, the truth is somewhere in the middle

turning to other subjects, can the Dems save the internet?
http://news.com.com/What+the+Democrats+win+means+for+tech/2100-1028_3-6133833.html
rumor has it they will call on their greatest champion to save his greatest invention thus saving the world from global warming due to lack of porn and free music
America's broadband sucks, its too expensive and too slow:
http://www.washingtonpost.com/wp-dyn/content/article/2006/11/07/AR2006110701230.html?nav=rss_opinion/columns
http://blogs.zdnet.com/ITFacts/?p=11906
and if you needed any absolute example of how copyright law has gotten out of hand, here it is:
http://mdn.mainichi-msn.co.jp/national/news/20061109p2a00m0na018000c.html

we bring it on ourselves, first we build a world-wide network of computers with increasing amounts of A.I., then we build robot ninjas that look exact like us, now we've let them know what we taste like...this can only end well:
http://blog.wired.com/tableofmalcontents/2006/11/robot_identifie.html?rss
and from this comes the YouTube vid o' the day:
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=XAAIs6TUmDg

if you've ever wanted to download anything from a new golf club to a VW Golf, MIT has the device for you:
http://money.cnn.com/magazines/fortune/fortune_archive/2006/11/13/8393124/index.htm

do you like beer? do you like to travel? then this link's for you!
http://www.msnbc.msn.com/id/15642039/

talk about your crappy alternative energy, poo to power procurator's place:
http://hosted.ap.org/dynamic/stories/S/SEWER_POWER?SITE=WHIZ&SECTION=HOME&TEMPLATE=DEFAULT

alright, this is getting ridiculous, we didn't have hot teachers sexing us up in high school and these bastards don't deserve it either:
http://www.kgw.com/news-local/stories/kgw_110906_news_rainier_teacher_student_sex_.1ea1e06a.html
http://www.9news.com/acm_news.aspx?OSGNAME=KUSA&IKOBJECTID=cb5f8486-0abe-421a-0026-f550d1640811&TEMPLATEID=0c76dce6-ac1f-02d8-0047-c589c01ca7bf

Ooo ugg ahh ooOOooga mmmaaa grrrr rrrrAAAA!!
http://www.kansas.com/mld/kansas/15965066.htm

a horse is a horse, of course, of course, unless its a burger:
http://www.reason.com/news/show/116591.html
remember kids, we only eat dumb, uncute things in God's Country

road trip!
http://www.wcpo.com/news/2006/local/11/09/thursdays.html

Oh my god! WATCH OUT FOR THE FALLING PRICES!!
http://money.cnn.com/2006/11/09/news/companies/walmart_blackfriday/index.htm?postversion=2006110912
and don't worry Christian shoppers, in addition to low prices you now get a "Merry Christmas" too:
http://money.cnn.com/2006/11/09/news/companies/walmart_christmas/index.htm

yeah so I've seen 11 out of 16...what of it?  best worst movies ever:
http://www.maximonline.com/slideshows/index.aspx?imgCollectId=130&src=mx194
my absolute favorite still has to be J.Lo firing that bolt action rifle several times without reloading
and the best line from the article "In fact, stand up in your cubicle right now and shout "Who is the master?" Anyone who doesn't answer "Sho' nuff!" is someone you never need to speak to again."

what email would be complete without the Daily Schadenfreude?
http://www.msnbc.msn.com/id/15643614/

Wednesday, November 8, 2006

roll that beautiful news footage!


well, I guess I have to rule out any conspiracy for Republicans to steal the election using e-voting...I'm kinda disappointed.  I love a good conspiracy but the best I can come up with now is that Republicans are just lulling us into a false sense of security before they really strike in '08.  oh yea, that's right, a third Bush term is just around the corner, you'll see.  but for now we bask in the light of our new partisan Congress which is sure to be more impotent than ever.  I do find it sad that after 6 years of ReBushicans and 12 years of GOP goodness that the better alternative is one where most of the power is canceled out.  but that's politics.

BOOYAH! bye bye Rummy, don't let the door hit your ass on the way out:
http://www.washingtonpost.com/wp-dyn/content/article/2006/11/08/AR2006110801579.html
and now we know what we didn't know when we were still thinking it was a known unknown:
http://www.thestar.com/NASApp/cs/ContentServer?pagename=thestar/Layout/Article_Type1&c=Article&cid=1162983718323&call_pageid=1144159007037

stem cells are evil and contain the souls of dead babies and have never been proven to do anything useful...wait, what's that? are you sure? I see....ladies and gentlemen stem cells cure blindness and are the greatest thing since sliced bread:
http://news.com.com/Blind+mice+see+again+after+cell+transplants/2100-11393_3-6133707.html
farmer's wife unavailable for comment

if you're being pummeled in the media, despised by the voters, and lacking any credible options for winning the election then the next best thing is to keep your opponents out of the voting booths:
http://www.dailykos.com/story/2006/11/6/1717/68014

nanotech is coming, will you live forever?
http://www.wonova.com/11/2006/do-you-want-to-live-forever-nanotechnology/
at the very least it would give you time to catch up on all those shows on your Tivo

who knew the man in the moon was really Shiva?
http://www.hindustantimes.com/news/181_1833877,00040005.htm

sweeeeeeeet, I want one, its the coolest phone yet:
http://www.techeblog.com/index.php/tech-gadget/samsung-sph-p9000
I continue to be disappointed in the lack of asswiping ability however

I think this is my favorite link this week, what do you do with a woman who's in jail for check fraud? let her post bail with a check, naturally:
http://www.chicagotribune.com/news/local/chi-061107counterfeit,1,6932000.story?coll=chi-news-hed&ctrack=1&cset=true

mmmmm, wrap your mouth around one of these, its so big and meaty:
http://www.thesun.co.uk/article/0,,2-2006510748,00.html

sexual enhancement from the other perspective (NSFW):
http://www.zug.com/pranks/viagra-for-women/index.html
and something to help her out:
http://www.local6.com/health/10263082/detail.html

and women wonder why we sleep around? it'd be dangerous NOT to!
http://www.thesun.co.uk/article/0,,2-2006510597,00.html

wouldn't you know that the "NASA caught napping" photos would be from Alabama:
http://www.local6.com/slideshow/news/10260207/detail.html?qs=;s=1;w=525

all I really need to know I learned in 80's cartoons:
http://www.cracked.com/modules.php?op=modload&name=News&file=article&sid=815

its gone all wrong, where's the german dude when you need him?
http://www.techeblog.com/index.php/tech-gadget/video-pimp-my-ride-gone-wrong#more-5470
UNPIMP DE AUTO!! SCHNELL!!

what floats like a duck, talks like a duck, and makes lots of fresh water like a duck?
http://www.newscientisttech.com/article.ns?id=dn10465&feedId=online-news_rss20
she's a witch!

excuse me, you have my stapler...now I have to kill you:
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=dGNs7QMeV7E

and last but not least, a true Daily Schadenfreude:
http://www.derekhail.com/2006/11/07/britney-spears-files-for-divorce-the-full-story/
congratulations K-Fed on your soon-to-be "where are they now?" celebrity status, I hear McDonald's is hiring

Sunday, November 5, 2006

my country tis of thee, sweet land of liberty...or so it seems (remember remember Nov 5)


Greetings and salutations my fellow Americans, I find my timing for this latest installment to be appropriate for many reasons.  First, today is the election.  Second, I just re-re-re-watched V for Vendetta and have been motivated to go out and attempt to make a difference in the world.  This email won't be my usual well organized fluff but a few of these links may give some insight into our world of today.

http://youtube.com/watch?v=uS75tSPpV7A  good bye democracy

http://www.cnn.com/2006/POLITICS/11/04/rumsfeld.departure/  I'll have two Rumsfields to go

http://sianews.com/modules.php?name=News&file=article&sid=3023   trapped in America

http://news.bbc.co.uk/2/hi/business/5303590.stm  economy sucks

http://news.bbc.co.uk/2/hi/business/6113978.stm  economy good?

http://www.chron.com/disp/story.mpl/ap/politics/4310060.html  don't ask, don't tell, don't collect $200
http://today.reuters.com/news/articlenews.aspx?type=topNews&storyID=2006-11-04T044513Z_01_N03442495_RTRUKOC_0_US-SECURITY-PRISONS.xml&WTmodLoc=NewsHome-C1-topNews-5

http://www.cnn.com/2006/POLITICS/11/02/kerry.photo/  joke's on kerry

http://www.nydailynews.com/front/story/468715p-394420c.html

http://www.dailycolonial.com/go.dc?p=3&s=3378

http://www.chicagotribune.com/news/custom/newsroom/chi-061106bush,1,207137.story?coll=chi-news-hed

Whoever you choose to vote for today will be your own decision.  I'm not going to advocate any particular candidate or ideology.  I only ask that you consider both where we've been and where we're going.  Honestly look at the issues and the positions offered.  Follow your heart and do the best thing possible for our nation.  Don't be lead by the rhetoric of either side, choose your own path.  Only by shedding our apathy can we hope to salvage our freedom and our future.  Godspeed and good luck.

~Joseph

Thursday, October 26, 2006

and now in other news that mostly doesn't cover politics


hey, women, if I can see you it makes me want to commit rape, get back in the kitchen where you belong:
http://www.nytimes.com/2006/10/27/world/asia/27australia.html
that's what my cleric told me

teh gayz, TEH GAYZ! THEY'RE GONNA GETZ TEH MARRAGEZ!!1one! GO VOTE!!
http://www.nytimes.com/2006/10/26/washington/26cnd-marriage.html?hp&ex=1161921600&en=ac60a5a80249aa4f&ei=5094&partner=homepage

but Mom, everybody else is torturing:
http://www.alertnet.org/thenews/newsdesk/N23410381.htm

the diamond age is upon us:
http://biz.yahoo.com/prnews/061025/dew017.html?.v=63

hang on Hubble!
http://news.bbc.co.uk/1/hi/sci/tech/6088076.stm

the Russians are having docking problems, obviously they didn't check their email first:
http://www.sci-tech-today.com/news/Docking-Problems-at-the-Space-Station/story.xhtml?story_id=122002OXY8VU

the government is testing sound warfare in New Zealand:
http://www.smh.com.au/news/technology/mystery-noise-is-a-real-humdinger/2006/10/24/1161455714733.html

today's horror story, AL GORE IN SSSSSPPPAAAACCCEEEE!
http://www.space.com/news/061026_gore_space.html

Nintendo up, Sony down...Wiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiii!
http://games.slashdot.org/games/06/10/26/1851229.shtml
http://www.techeblog.com/index.php/tech-gadget/red-steel-wii-multiplayer-footage

history would never reveal why DVD Jon would be more popular than DVDA Jon:
http://playlistmag.com/weblogs/ipodblog/2006/10/doubletwist/index.php

technology at work for you, Discrimi-Nav, avoid all those pesky (insert racial group here):
http://www.techeblog.com/index.php/tech-gadget/discriminav-the-racially-discriminating-gps-system

not getting enough sex? try Nuclear Weapons(tm)! the all-new homeopathic remedy from Kim Jong-il:
http://wcbstv.com/watercooler/watercooler_story_299103331.html

forget the mouse, use your eyes:
http://www.techeblog.com/index.php/tech-gadget/immersive-eye-tracking-computer

fruit roll-ups: old and busted, teh new hawtness: roll-up displays
http://www.techeblog.com/index.php/tech-gadget/video-philips-readus-demonstration

damn the cigars! war is a sucker born every minute:
http://today.reuters.com/news/articlenews.aspx?type=oddlyEnoughNews&storyID=2006-10-25T141127Z_01_N24206601_RTRUKOC_0_US-ARTS-QUOTATIONS.xml&WTmodLoc=OddNewsHome_C1_[Feed]-8&rpc=92

these Ethiopians need to understand that internation corporations know what's best for us, that's why they pay all those politicians:
http://www.itv.com/news/world_f2cf99817ca9fbb8a860c1e7ae86e08e.html

sexsomniacs fear not, help is on the way:
http://news.yahoo.com/s/nm/20061026/od_nm/sexsomniacs1_dc

get ready for the new 14-blade Gillette FusionUltraKrazyMachEliminator:
http://www.economist.com/science/displaystory.cfm?story_id=5624861
and the Onion has been proven prescient:
http://www.theonion.com/content/node/33930

I got your bling right here!
http://www.techeblog.com/index.php/tech-gadget/lexus-builds-chrome-is250

Supersoaker mods for the adventurous among you:
http://www.sscentral.org/tech/mods/

FINISH HIM!!  SCIENTOLOGY!!
http://www.cbsnews.com/stories/2006/10/25/48hours/main2124568.shtml
this is a new finishing move in Mortal Kombat: Impossible starring Tom Kruise

flat TVs with amazing pictures, high contrast, blah blah blah:
http://www.techeblog.com/index.php/tech-gadget/video-sed-displays
these have been "coming out soon" longer than the aforementioned celebrity

and the winner of the youtube video of the day goes to:
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=dIM27kq24Jw

The Daily Schadenfreude:
http://blog.newspaperindex.com/2006/10/26/the-internet-is-for-porn/

Wednesday, October 25, 2006

tick tock goes the election clock, but whose time is it?


It's election time folks, that wonderful, feel-good time of the year where we all get to bitch about how horrible the government is and then promptly do nothing about it.  The apathy of America come election time is much the same as the leaves changing color in the Northeast.  Everybody loves to comment on it and vows that they're gonna make it out there "one of these days" but the only people who do make it out are the people who live there (and hate having to rake the damn leaves) and those retired people who have too much time on their hands (and have nothing better to do).  Endless hours will be spent on every news outlet discussing ad nauseam every detail of the election: page scandals and who knew what when, foreign policy or lack there-of, staying the course or pulling out (Republicans have yet to stage the mother-of-all arguments against this one), fences, "nucular" weapons (Iran and the guy with the platform shoes), oil prices, security vs. rights, etc.  But for all the hot air blowing in the media, the cold air seems to keep people at home come election time.  Voter turnout among the younger demographics has always been lackadaisical at best.  Sadly, most younger people fail to grasp how the issues of today are going to have grave consequence for them in years to come.  Simply put, today's screw-ups will be paid out of the pockets of the younger generations for decades to come.  The octogenarians who play the power game have the distinct advantage of being able to reap the benefits, blame their failure to sow on mental decline, then kick off before the next winter.  Meanwhile, we of the younger generations are left holding the bag of flaming dog poo, unable to ring the geezers' bells before they croak.  We're the ones who will pay off the $9 Trillion dollar debt, go without Social Security, (hopefully) fight to regain our lost rights, wean the country off foreign energy, and rebuild our standing in the international community.  God help us.  In the meantime, there's plenty of "The Simple Life" and "American Idol" on the Tivo, lots of trendy, formulaic pop songs on the iPod, and loads of "friends" waiting for you to post your latest drunken escapades on Facebook...better get to it, these things don't take care of themselves.



Stealing an Election 101: or how I learned to stop worrying and love democracy
http://arstechnica.com/articles/culture/evoting.ars
and if that doesn't work for ya, just skew the media however you like:
http://www.nytimes.com/2006/10/26/us/politics/26googlebomb.html?ex=1319515200&en=cf9c1ab0c65c62b2&ei=5088&partner=rssnyt&emc=rss

Russia opposes the current sanctions draft for Iran:
http://www.news.com.au/story/0,23599,20653467-1702,00.html
mainly because they have alot of money tied up there, specifically in constructing a NUCLEAR REACTOR:
http://www.washingtonpost.com/wp-dyn/content/article/2006/10/26/AR2006102600904_2.html
clearly they are unbiased in this situation

how free is your expression?
http://www.npr.org/templates/story/story.php?storyId=6249980

Canucks...the tree-huggin', freedom-hatin', weed-tokin', socialist-healthcare-givin' neighbors to the north are just a bunch of sissies:
http://www.ctv.ca/servlet/ArticleNews/story/CTVNews/20061025/canada_midterms_061026/20061026?hub=TopStories

(today's inappropriate joke is brought to you by the makers of Head-on; remember, apply directly to the forehead, failure to apply to the forehead can result in nausea, dizziness, low sperm count, mood swings, indigestion, and possible heart attack, use as directed)
Michael J. Fox shakes up the election race with a new tv ad:
http://today.reuters.com/news/articlenews.aspx?type=topNews&storyID=2006-10-26T195013Z_01_N26202522_RTRUKOC_0_US-STEMCELLS.xml&WTmodLoc=NewsHome-C1-topNews-4
but fear not, Red-staters; Jesus, Ray's wife, and some important sports figures are on the case to give the issue a shakedown:
http://www.rawstory.com/news/2006/Passions_Caviezel_sports_stars_oppose_stem_1025.html
don't forget kids, if Jesus wanted you to be like normal people, he wouldn't have given you all those diseases
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=nguJQ_dRPXw&eurl=
I like how Kurt Warner dismisses the idea, "well California spent $6Billion and they won't see results for 15yrs, obviously its not worth it, I mean, who wants to wait 15yrs for something?"

blogging on attack from all sides:
http://www.acsblog.org/economic-regulation-employment-3122-will-legal-blogs-be-construed-as-advertisements.html

what's more fun than Republican's children embarassing them? not much!
http://www.wonkette.com/politics/kids/more-facebook-fun-bob-corkers-daughter-e%20xperiments-with-mary-cheneyism-180720.php
http://www.wonkette.com/politics/facebook/another-week-another-political-kids-facebook-profile-201353.php
http://www.wonkette.com/politics/top/pierce-bush-and-facebook-need-we-say-more-182289.php
I could go on, but enough fun for one day, next time Dems take the seat

Friday, October 13, 2006

this newsletter certified free of black cats, ladders, and broken mirrors


doing anything or saying anything about North Korea is an act of war:
http://www.foxnews.com/story/0,2933,219620,00.html
ah crap, I just committed an act of war
but can they really do something about it?
http://www.msnbc.msn.com/id/15217370/?boom
another good breakdown of the situation:
http://www.stratfor.com/products/premium/read_article.php?id=277894

damn the torpedoes, stay the course; and don't pay any attention to that silly death report, those guys totally made that up and people who make stuff up are bad people:
http://www.voanews.com/english/2006-10-11-voa41.cfm
and now for the science:
http://commentisfree.guardian.co.uk/richard_horton/2006/10/post_499.html
more rejection:
http://www.csmonitor.com/2006/1012/dailyUpdate.html
and the counter:
http://commentisfree.guardian.co.uk/daniel_davies/2006/10/how_to_not_lie_with_statistics.html

good news! the deficit is the smallest its been in FOUR WHOLE YEARS!
http://www.latimes.com/news/nationworld/nation/la-na-deficit12oct12,0,5575449.story?coll=la-home-nation
uh, well, maybe its not that good:
http://www.businessweek.com/investor/content/oct2006/pi20061013_228665.htm?chan=top+news_top+news+index_investing
but perhaps things aren't so bad:
http://www.nytimes.com/2006/10/13/business/13econ.html?hp&ex=1160712000&en=28dfd95b4eb52af1&ei=5094&partner=homepage
nope, we're boned:
http://www.cbc.ca/cp/business/061012/b101282.html
oooor not:
http://www.philly.com/mld/inquirer/business/15745336.htm
just remember kids, when you have things like "numbers" and "statistics" you can make them say whatever you want.  and if they don't say what you want you can just say the people who produced them are full of crap ( see above).  or you can just add a couple of days here and there and call it a day instead:
http://delong.typepad.com/sdj/2006/10/the_bush_admini.html

the justice department is considering bringing treason charges against an American fighting with al Qaeda:
http://today.reuters.com/news/articlenews.aspx?type=topNews&storyID=2006-10-11T171057Z_01_N11240953_RTRUKOC_0_US-SECURITY-USA-QAEDA.xml&WTmodLoc=NewsHome-C1-topNews-7
perhaps its time for a history lesson and try and figure out why they didn't charge the last guy with treason and instead issued a gag order forbidding him from talking about treatment in US custody:
http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/John_Walker_Lindh#Trial

and speaking of not being able to speak, don't back talk Cheney, he don't like it:
http://www.progressive.org/mag_mc100406?cheney
I just wonder how much longer I have till they come for me

Mark Warner steps out of the '08 running, so much for a decent candidate that can get something positive done:
http://today.reuters.com/news/articlenews.aspx?type=politicsNews&storyID=2006-10-12T160141Z_01_N12316646_RTRUKOC_0_US-WARNER.xml&WTmodLoc=NewsHome-C3-politicsNews-3
Arun, this is your fault, you need to go talk to this guy

this week's invadable country:
http://www.npr.org/templates/story/story.php?storyId=6248500

what news did you not read this week?
http://www.tucsonweekly.com/gbase/Currents/Content?oid=oid:86394

the Apple NY store is an insult to Islam, its a cube, the Kaaba is a cube...you see the connection:
http://www.theregister.co.uk/2006/10/11/apple_ny_store/
welcome to the United States of Islam, where muslims can discriminate against whoever they don't like, but we can't pull them out of a line in the airport for additional screening:
http://www.cnsnews.com/ViewCommentary.asp?Page=/Commentary/archive/200610/COM20061011a.html
I think the phrase "double standard" is lost on them

nice to know that the government is doing it's job protecting us from monopolies and Big Business:
http://breakingnews.nypost.com/dynamic/stories/A/ATT_BELLSOUTH_MERGER?SITE=NYNYP&SECTION=HOME&TEMPLATE=DEFAULT&CTIME=2006-10-11-01-21-50
and that they make sure we have enough money to live:
http://www.msnbc.msn.com/id/15227667/

forget global warming, watch out for changes in Earth orbit:
http://today.reuters.co.uk/news/articlenews.aspx?type=scienceNews&storyID=2006-10-11T174712Z_01_L1123737_RTRIDST_0_SCIENCE-SCIENCE-MAMMALS-DC.XML
and what if we all vanished today? what would happen to Earth:
http://www.newscientist.com/channel/life/mg19225731.100

lawyers work for the good of the people (people here are defined as lawyers):
http://washtimes.com/upi/20061011-040733-8984r.htm

video games are a public nuisance:
http://gamepolitics.com/2006/10/11/breaking-miami-court-orders-take-two-to-turn-over-bully/

buy a DVD, play it on anything but a PC:
http://blogs.zdnet.com/hardware/index.php?p=114

get ready for TV with frickin' laser beams in it:
http://www.theage.com.au/news/NATIONAL/Laser-TV-predicted-to-be-death-of-plasma/2006/10/10/1160246121576.html

cue horrible joke (I can't help myself!!);
I don't get why everyone is making such a big deal out of a Lidle crash:
http://sports.espn.go.com/mlb/news/story?id=2623116&campaign=rss&source=ESPNHeadlines
STRAIGHT to hell, yes sir, STRAIGHT to hell...

I'll say this much for the first time, thank goodness for carbon dioxide emissions:
http://www.eurekalert.org/pub_releases/2006-10/aps-gim100706.php

I want to say I already reported this, but DEAR GOD, they'll deep fry anything:
http://www.charlotte.com/mld/charlotte/15726857.htm
that having been said, I still want to try it
but has all that deep-fried goodness made you a fatass? then you're in luck! get ready for "negative calories", brought to you by the same Coca-Cola:
http://www.smh.com.au/news/business/coke-serves-green-tea-to-a-world-with-calories-to-burn/2006/10/12/1160246260394.html

vigilante justice, just the way momma used to serve it:
http://www.oregonlive.com/search/index.ssf?/base/news/11606181328340.xml?oregonian?lcg&coll=7

now you may think I'm a terrible person for laughing my ass off at this one, but I will point out that if this lady were 40yrs younger you'd all be laughing with me so we'll just assume all that extra time will heal her wounds because she probably doesn't have much left as it is, that being said, I present the Daily Schadenfreude:
http://abcnews.go.com/US/wireStory?id=2560288
I'm absolutely sure that the postal worker was joking around with her, noting the obvious that an almost 90yr old grandmother is probably the least likely person to be going on some jihad, and she can't take a joke

Tuesday, October 10, 2006

Oompa Loompa doopadee doo, I've got another email for you, oompa loompa doopadee dee, if you don't read it I will kill ye


oh? there are other members of the Axis of Evil(tm) besides Iraq? well I'll be damned:
http://www.washingtonpost.com/wp-dyn/content/article/2006/10/09/AR2006100901130.html
and this is all Bush's fault, the internet told me so:
http://www.politicalcortex.com/story/2006/10/10/134245/41

only $1.65Billion? what a steal!
http://www.pcworld.com/article/id,127452-c,mergersacquisitions/article.html
Welcome to the Googlenet formally known as the internet.

Sony to combat North Korean nukes and terrorism with Blu-ray discs:
http://www.vnunet.com/vnunet/news/2165974/sony-lifts-curtain-first-50gb
a senior official had this to say "who would want to jihad and launch nukes when you could watch Click on Blu-ray?  Now Adam Sandler, that guy is FUNNY!"
and ladies and gentlemen, once again, the "format war" has reached a stalemate:
http://arstechnica.com/news.ars/post/20061010-7948.html
now we just have to wait till HI-DVD and Holo-ray discs come a courtin' for another format war battle

generating power with kites:
http://www.wired.com/news/technology/0,71908-0.html?tw=wn_index_3
didn't Ben Franklin already do that?

oh no! Qatari FM says Hamas rejects two key points in Doha initiative! 
http://english.people.com.cn/200610/10/eng20061010_310506.html
what the hell does that MEAN??

a gel that can stop bleeding during surgery reducing operation time by half, BRILLANT!!
http://www.thestandard.com.hk/news_detail.asp?pp_cat=11&art_id=29141&sid=10313489&con_type=1
or you can just use good ol' maggot juice:
http://www.newscientisttech.com/article/dn10260-pour-on-maggot-juice-to-help-heal-wounds.html
good news everyone, we may be able to pay for health care after all:
http://seattlepi.nwsource.com/business/287864_drugsettle07.html

this is going to be a freaking awesome game:
http://www.techeblog.com/index.php/tech-gadget/new-half-life-2-portal-gameplay

I eat at Al's Mediterranean Deli and Grill alot, that'll stop Alzheimer's right?
http://www.washingtonpost.com/wp-dyn/content/article/2006/10/09/AR2006100900997.html
I eat at Al's Mediterranean Deli and Grill alot, that'll stop Alzheimer's right?

the Bush Administration to use The Brangelina Effect to defuse tensions with the North Koreans:
http://www.dnaindia.com/report.asp?NewsID=1057864

I bet you remember hearing about the holographic hard drive the government had back in the 80's:
http://www.techeblog.com/index.php/tech-gadget/a-look-back-1980s-solid-state-hard-drive
wow, its got a 100 jiggabytes of memory storage, I wonder if it goes 88mph?
and apparently they didn't store that video clip on it either

get out your plumber's gloves boys and girls, the real Super Mario game is here:
http://games.slashdot.org/games/06/10/09/2242202.shtml
and if you don't feel like doing actual physical activity while gaming, fear not, the brain controller is here:
http://news-info.wustl.edu/news/page/normal/7800.html

for you ladies out there, how to live with a Southern Man:
http://www.citizen-times.com/apps/pbcs.dll/article?AID=2006610100301

these planes will have more than meets the eye:
http://abcnews.go.com/Technology/wireStory?id=2546933

magnetic power generation? or another hoax?
http://www.techeblog.com/?p=4803&cp=all#comments

remember, be kind, rewind!
http://www.techeblog.com/index.php/tech-gadget/dvd-rewinder

holy crap, beer flavored chips:
http://www.thepublican.com/story.asp?sectioncode=7&storycode=53071&c=1

a Daily Schadenfreude worth every penny:
http://www.news.com.au/story/0,23599,20555319-13762,00.html
oh I remember that commercial:
http://www.nationwide.com/images/flash/wrongturn30.wmv